The holidays usually invoke these emotions, dread, joy or both. You dread the family member you have to spend time with and joy comes from spending time together. It’s an oxymoron, right?
Not really when we think about all of the other emotions that get stirred up during this time of year. We may love the decorating, baking and all of the fun stuff but dread those people that we may only see once or twice a year that we have nothing in common with, or have an issue with, or in my case, the kids that have declared an “emotional time out.”
For me, at first when dealing with the declaration of an “emotional time out”, there’s disappointment, anger, and a little guilt but after I stepped back and viewed the situation with a clearer perspective what I came away with is relief! That may sound horrible to some but why put yourself through a situation that is filled with tension, hostility, and people that don’t want to be in your company?
Is that really what the holidays are all about or what society has made us believe we “should” do?
I’m not trying to be a “Debbie Downer” but let’s look at this a little deeper, who really says that you can’t take an emotional time out during the holidays? Where is there a law written that says, the cousin, sister-in-law or kid you have an issue with has to come to your house? Or you have to go there? Or in my case that I have to spend time with kids that have issues with me?
Yes, I know there are repercussions from other members of your family but what is your sanity worth? A lot I hope! And who has to live with your decisions but you in the end and you may walk away with a greater sense of self-esteem and boundaries.
So back to my personal situation, which did spark this post, for one of my kids, it has lead us to an amazing dialogue about how we got to this point and my other kid, well I’m still waiting but that’s okay, I would rather take this emotional break than to look back on these holidays as the holidays from hell. That may not work for you but peace and good vibes are very important to me right now.
Does all of this make me a little sad? It did in the beginning and it may for you too if you decide to take that time out but what may be gained is hidden treasures of awakening, boundaries and possibly an amazing dialogue.
Now I would love to hear from you dear readers, would an emotional time out be something you would be willing to risk? If not, why?
Sharing is caring, so share with someone in your tribe that might need to hear this too.
Peace, love and happy amazing holidays!