Oh happiness, why do you elude us? We want you to jump on our backs like fleas on a dog and bite a bit of cheer into our every day. Once bitten, we try so hard to rid ourselves of you, scratching and clawing to get you out of our lives. Where does this vicious cycle end?

Every day we search endlessly for happiness. We look for happiness in objects, in people, in our jobs and in different locations. While we might get a glimpse or a whisper of happiness from time to time, it still refuses to stay with us for very long.

Or is it the other way around?

Once we have happiness and start enjoying the presence of its company we start trying to find ways to sabotage the feeling. We feel guilty because we are happy and others are not or we don’t feel worthy of that happiness feeling. So off we go to make ourselves unhappy and shake happiness out of our very souls.

Happiness is a choice, a conscience choice that needs to be nurtured and stroked like a cute furry puppy. When we want that puppy to lie still beside us, we cuddle and rub its belly, speaking softly and gently. If you want happiness to stay and be your constant companion you have to make room for happiness to grow. To do this you will have to make the choice of letting go of some old ideas that conflict with you being happy.

From my own personal experience, one of the biggest things that will stand in your way of happiness is the desire to always be right. Sounds ridiculous when you say it out loud doesn’t it but it’s true. The more you try to be right the harder you have to work at being right instead of just being happy.

You deserve to be happy!

Make that choice to put the same effort into happiness as you do at always being right. Work at being happy, make a mantra out of “Do you want to be right or do you want to be happy?” Be willing to make the effort to change just one thing about being right and see what happens. Then do it again and see what happens. Each time it will get easier and you will find the company of happiness more often.

Clear out some space in your life and stop your search for happiness. It is as close as warm puppy breath on your cheek, always there…..just waiting. Tell happiness to stay and tell yourself it’s okay if it stays. There’s always room.

photo credit: rkleine via photo pin cc

“I have created a life by stepping out of the box of people’s limitations. I call it zigging when others are zagging.” ~Oprah

You have spring cleaned your closet, put some of your past to rest and realigned the priorities in your life, so now what? What would happen if you “stepped outside the box” and did something that you really didn’t think you could do?

Sometimes when we do all of “life’s housekeeping” we stop the momentum in mid-stream, thinking that we are done, sitting back and waiting for good things to happen. But are we really done?  Why did we create all of this space if not to pursue something we crave and never had the courage to do?« Continue »

“Think about any attachments that are depleting your emotional reserves.

 Consider letting them go.” ~Oprah Winfrey

After last week’s post about letting go to move forward with your life, I thought I would continue with that theme of “letting go” and talk about letting go of your stuff. It’s amazing how stuck we get when we are trying to let go of not only the past but the physical things that might be attached to that past.

Case in point, a couple of my friends, who are also Zen Chick community members were upset about the subject last week. Their response, “Did you really have to write this now?” complimented with an eye roll or two.

Yes, it is hard but the more you pursue letting go the easier it becomes. So let’s keep that ball rolling by seeing what physical stuff we can get rid of too.

OUR STUFF! We become attached to it, want to buy more of it while it consumes time and space in our lives. So where do we draw the line?

For me over the years and especially after we moved into our 1000 square foot little farm house, I really started evaluating my stuff. With less closet space and less over all space (not that we moved from a huge house) I let go of a lot of things and have continued with the “letting go” process.

Here are some of the rules I live by:

1. If you haven’t worn something in a year then it gets recycled at Goodwill or a used clothing store of your choice. 
2. If you buy new clothes, shoes, etc. something old must leave. In another words you have to make it an even trade.
3. Minimize the amount of stuff that is sitting out for display. I’m not a “collections person” and don’t really want a whole lot of things to dust.
4. If there is something that you really think you have to have, don’t buy it that day. Wait a few days or weeks and see if you still “have to have it”. Also make sure that it fits into your life instead of just taking up space.
5. Rule #2 applies to household items, something comes in, something goes out.
6. Really get all of the “use” out of your old stuff. You don’t really have to have the latest technology, fashion or gadget. Buy a good basic model that fits your needs not the one with all of the bells and whistles.

These are my basic rules and I have found as I get older my attachment to my stuff becomes less and less. I don’t feel the need to keep boxes and boxes of stuff stored somewhere. Good memories serve me much better than boxes filled with things. 

Ask anyone who has “lightened” their lives of their stuff and they will tell you just that, they feel lighter. Wouldn’t you like to have that feeling along with adding more space and time to your life?

Start slow with one small project at a time. Maybe it’s going through your clothes closet or smaller still, clearing off your desk. Each thing you remove will allow you to feel lighter and the process will become easier with time. As with any change in your life it takes time, practice and diligence so stay focused on your task at hand.

Most important of all, you have to be gentle with yourself during this letting go process. Don’t let that little voice inside your head beat you up because you are not getting things done fast enough. 

I would love to hear your “rules about letting go of stuff” and your success stories. Together we will continue to move forward into slowing down, simplifying and living a life we truly love.

photo credit: Pete Hindle via photopin cc

“With each sunrise, we start anew” – Anonymous

This past week, how many sunrises did you see?  Yes amidst the endless to-do list, errands to run and an inbox that always overflows, did you add sunrises to your list of must dos? Or better yet do you remember the last sunrise you saw?

We all get caught up in “busy” and it gets to be a bad habit. Yes there’s always lots to do and yes that will never end unless you change the way you deal with your “busy” habit.« Continue »

 “Of all the people I have ever known, those who have pursued their dreams and failed have lived a much more fulfilling life than those who have put their dreams on a shelf for fear of failure.”  ~Author Unknown

Have you ever noticed when faced with a new situation, a career change or another life altering choice, you are plagued with the WHAT IFs?  What if I don’t make the right decision, what will happen?

We are all faced with what ifs almost every day and they can really drag you down. The mind doesn’t like change so what ifs are a great way of keeping you stuck in a rut, never to reach your true potential.« Continue »