Zen Chick

Zen Chick

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"There is more to life than increasing its speed. Slow down, breathe and enjoy. "

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Archives for February 2015

Why “Fearless” Is One Of My Core Desire Feelings.

By Gay Barefield Leave a Comment Feb 14

“Want to bring out the best in people? Ask them how they want to feel”

~Truthbomb/Danielle LaPorte

The word “fearless” can conjure images of bungee jumping, extreme biking or snow boarding off impossible mountains. Sounds scary and fun but that’s not where I’m going with this wonderful word.

Let me show you how I see the word fearless, fear+less=less fear.

As one of my core desire feelings (or CDFs), having less fear in my life means less worry. Worry for me is a revolving hamster wheel and I’m the hamster. I want to get off that damn wheel but my ever cycling thoughts keep me glued to it until FEAR shows up.

Fear then delivers his famous, hated monologue, “what if or you can’t or think of what will happen if you do that?”

This monologue is what will stop me in my tracks causing me to question everything that I know to be right and dead on. Then fear sits and waits, oh so patiently, for me to circle back around and question everything again.

Fear is a very tricky fellow indeed!

Fearless lives at the top of my CDFs. Asking myself everyday what I can do to feel fearless keeps me off the hamster wheel of thoughts and even if I get there I can quickly find my way back off.

Here are some of the ways I feel fearless every day:

  • I write it out every day, my worry or fear, putting it down on paper. My journal is The Desire Map Day Planner which helps me focus on gratitude, how to live out my CDFs in all areas of my life, what’s working and what’s not. At the end of every week I evaluate how it has stacked up based on how I want to feel.
  • Redirecting my thoughts is how I get back off the hamster wheel, a mantra of “I want to feel fearless” may sound simple but it works.
  • Pushing through the worry or fear by going ahead and doing whatever it is that is causing the issue. If I’m thinking too much about making a decision or phone call or whatever I’m blocking, just pushing through and doing it works every time.

Feeling fearless allows me to push that worry away, makes me really focus on why I’m feeling that fear. Then I can make a decision based on my intuition instead of the fear itself.

Fear does have a purpose from time to time but when it blocks things that you want to do or keeps you going down the rabbit hole of worry then fear+less comes into play.

Finding out how to feel fearless every day has helped me to break some old cycles and habits. It has opened up different ways of thinking and ways to be indifferent about things that don’t need my attention.

My core desire feelings are my guideposts, my trail markers to how I want to live my life based on how I want to feel every day.

What are my other core desire feelings you may wonder?

They are, light, soul joy, playful and freedom.

Ready to find your core desire feelings and change the way you feel in your life? Join me for The Desire Map Workshop (click here) and together we will discover how you want to feel in your life everyday.

photo credit: First Tattoo via photopin (license)

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These are charities that I believe are making a difference in our world. I welcome you to check them out and please donate if one speaks to you.

World Central KitchenWorld Central KitchenI believe that food, shelter and water are basic rights for every human on this planet. Jose’ Andres’ and his WCK group step in to provide beautiful, nutritious food during disasters, the pandemic, and any other opportunity where people need to be fed.Learn More Foothills Humane SocietyFoothills Humane SocietyThis is my local shelter, in Columbus, NC, doing a wonderful job at remaining as close to 100% no kill as possible. Animals make us more human and I believe in adopting not shopping for pets, saving a life with a new beginning.Learn More Trees, Water & People Trees, Water & People Caring for Mother Earth by planting trees, helping people live sustainably and decreasing our carbon footprint are things that I see as very important for the next seven generations.Learn More Lakota Law ProjectLakota Law ProjectI have a strong kinship to Native people and this group works to change many of the injustices done to the first people that still go on today, such as the right to vote.Learn More

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