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Zen Chick

Slow down. Simplify. Love your life.

"There is more to life than increasing its speed. Slow down, breathe and enjoy. "

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Archives for June 2013

The Invisible Force That Can Stop You From Getting What You Want.

By Gay Barefield Leave a Comment Jun 29

“Resistance will reason with you like a lawyer or jam a nine-millimeter in your face like a stickup man. Resistance has no conscience. It will pledge anything to get a deal, then double-cross you as soon as your back is turned. If you take Resistance at its word, you deserve everything you get. Resistance is always lying and always full of shit.”

“To yield to Resistance deforms our spirit. It stunts us and makes us less than we are and were born to be.”~ Steven Pressfield, The War of Art

I just finished reading “The War of Art” (for the second time) and Steven Pressfield has Resistance pegged at every wicked twist and turn.

I was truly amazed at the ability of this “invisible force” to stop all of us in our tracks, to damage, delay and truly derail us in the pursuit of our dreams or even to improve our lives.

Even though Pressfield’s book was written about the pursuit of writing (mostly) and working through creative blocks, it truly applies to any aspect of our lives that we would like to improve. From simplifying your home, losing weight, breaking bad habits, or making that leap of faith to follow your dreams.

What does Resistance look like? Pressfield gives some great examples:

  • FEAR
  • self-sabotage
  • sabotage by others (usually those closest to you)
  • procrastination (this is the most common one)
  • self-dramazation
  • addiction (drugs, alcohol, internet, gambling, etc.)
  • trouble and cruelty to others
  • victimhood
  • criticism of others who are beating resistance

You are starting to get the picture of Resistance, right?

Resistance is the invisible force that can (not will) keep us miserable and searching for what we know in our heart and soul that we need to be doing. To beat it you must stay on your game at all times and be vigilant in your task. Pressfield calls this,” turning pro.“

Pressfield also refers to “calling on your muse” for help also. Your muse is your allies, angels, genius or whatever you may call the unseen helpers in your life.

Turning pro means that you are willing to do the work, nose to the grindstone and embracing every aspect of the work. You are not waiting for success to find you, you are making it happen!

When you make up your mind to view yourself as pro the will to do the work follows.This is true whether you are following your dreams or wanting to lose 20 pounds.

To Resistance it doesn’t matter which dream or goal you choose, the minute you stop doing what you know you need to do then Resistance dances across the goal line and scores.

Doing the work is not easy and with Resistance nipping at your heels it will be tedious but you owe it to yourself and the rest of the world the effort it will take. Once you do turn pro then your work will take on a different feel and the things that were a big deal no longer appear that way.

Let’s look at the qualities of turning pro: (see if you like these better)

  • Patience, the pro is willing to wait for gratification instead of jumping in head first with a level of intensity that cannot be maintained.
  • Eliminates chaos and demands order in his/her life.
  • Acts in the face of fear instead of trying to overcome it.
  • Accepts no excuses for not doing the work every day, regardless of what Resistance has conjured up.
  • Is prepared each day to confront his own self-sabotage.
  • Dedicates him or herself to mastering the technique and learning as much as he/she can.
  • DOES NOT HESITATE TO ASK FOR HELP (do I need to say this one again)
  • Distance him/herself from failure or success, in other words, doesn’t take either one personally.
  • Self-validates
  • Knows his/her limitations and hires other professionals if needed.

Resistance is something that will always haunt your pursuits, how you handle it is up to you. I hope you choose to kick its ass by approaching everything you pursue by turning pro. Regardless of how small you think the job is do it like your life depends on it.

Now I would love to hear your comments about how you have beaten Resistance by turning pro or how Resistance is really kicking you right now and how you plan on turning pro to beat it.

Thanks for reading and please share the love  of this post with someone in your life who might need help battling Resistance. We are all here to help each other!

 

 

photo credit: SurFeRGiRL30 via photopin cc

Simple Isn’t Always Easy

By Gay Barefield Leave a Comment Jun 15

“The greatest step towards a life of simplicity is to learn to let go.” 
~ Steve Maraboli

We all wish we had an “Easy” button to push when we want to make changes in our lives, press the button and change happens magically.

When I finished writing the “5 Steps To Put More “Zen” Into Your Life” for the Zen Chick community members (not a member yet? Sign up and receive it for free) it all sounded so easy. But I knew regardless of how simple it all sounded it would take real work to make it happen.

Once we commit to the task of change and the work it involves, we are then faced with our nemesis, resistance.

Resistance steps in, and reminds us that we can’t change and why would we want to. Things are good just the way they are and haven’t we heard this same old tired pitch before. It didn’t work for us then so why should it now.

And the big one…….it’s just too simple to really work.

Now simple has become very hard to do.

The minute you hear the battle cry of resistance, which is “I have heard this all before“ this is your turning point. This is where you need to tune in instead of tuning out because there is some new bit of information in this simple change that will help you along your path. Once you tune in, resistance will weaken and you have the choice to move forward.

Or go back to the “same ole same ole” and wonder why your life still sucks.

Everything that is worth anything will require some work especially if it’s moving you toward your dream, your passion or even the thing that makes you dance in your living room with sheer joy.

Simple changes can provide the biggest rewards in your life if you start slowly, one baby step at a time, not expecting an overnight miracle. (or that instant gratification thing)

For example, let’s say one of the changes you want to make is organizing and uncluttering your life starting with your house. You can look at the big picture, the whole house and it’s just too overwhelming. So you start with one drawer, one closet or one counter surface and you move slowly one step at a time.

Every day you make progress, step by step, slow and steady. Then when you have completed let’s say one room, you have freed up more time and space in your life and your house for what you really want to do.

Was it work? Yes.

Was the change concept simple? Yes.

Was the payoff (more time for you) worth the effort? YES!

You deserve to live a life you truly love filled with time for the things that truly mean something to you. So take that simple first step, welcome change into your life and do the work it takes. And kick resistance out the door! You will be so glad you did.

I would love to hear your comments on some of the simple changes you have made in your life and your method for making a smooth transition.

Share the love of this article on your FB page, Twitter or email it to a friend! 

photo credit: spackletoe via photopin cc

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World Central KitchenWorld Central KitchenI believe that food, shelter and water are basic rights for every human on this planet. Jose’ Andres’ and his WCK group step in to provide beautiful, nutritious food during disasters, the pandemic, and any other opportunity where people need to be fed.Learn More Foothills Humane SocietyFoothills Humane SocietyThis is my local shelter, in Columbus, NC, doing a wonderful job at remaining as close to 100% no kill as possible. Animals make us more human and I believe in adopting not shopping for pets, saving a life with a new beginning.Learn More Trees, Water & People Trees, Water & People Caring for Mother Earth by planting trees, helping people live sustainably and decreasing our carbon footprint are things that I see as very important for the next seven generations.Learn More Lakota Law ProjectLakota Law ProjectI have a strong kinship to Native people and this group works to change many of the injustices done to the first people that still go on today, such as the right to vote.Learn More

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