June 2012 - Zen Chick

Oh happiness, why do you elude us? We want you to jump on our backs like fleas on a dog and bite a bit of cheer into our every day. Once bitten, we try so hard to rid ourselves of you, scratching and clawing to get you out of our lives. Where does this vicious cycle end?

Every day we search endlessly for happiness. We look for happiness in objects, in people, in our jobs and in different locations. While we might get a glimpse or a whisper of happiness from time to time, it still refuses to stay with us for very long.

Or is it the other way around?

Once we have happiness and start enjoying the presence of its company we start trying to find ways to sabotage the feeling. We feel guilty because we are happy and others are not or we don’t feel worthy of that happiness feeling. So off we go to make ourselves unhappy and shake happiness out of our very souls.

Happiness is a choice, a conscience choice that needs to be nurtured and stroked like a cute furry puppy. When we want that puppy to lie still beside us, we cuddle and rub its belly, speaking softly and gently. If you want happiness to stay and be your constant companion you have to make room for happiness to grow. To do this you will have to make the choice of letting go of some old ideas that conflict with you being happy.

From my own personal experience, one of the biggest things that will stand in your way of happiness is the desire to always be right. Sounds ridiculous when you say it out loud doesn’t it but it’s true. The more you try to be right the harder you have to work at being right instead of just being happy.

You deserve to be happy!

Make that choice to put the same effort into happiness as you do at always being right. Work at being happy, make a mantra out of “Do you want to be right or do you want to be happy?” Be willing to make the effort to change just one thing about being right and see what happens. Then do it again and see what happens. Each time it will get easier and you will find the company of happiness more often.

Clear out some space in your life and stop your search for happiness. It is as close as warm puppy breath on your cheek, always there…..just waiting. Tell happiness to stay and tell yourself it’s okay if it stays. There’s always room.

photo credit: rkleine via photo pin cc

Do not go where the path may lead, go instead where there is no path and leave a trail

~ Ralph Waldo Emerson

Retirement. It’s the alluring white light at the end of the tunnel that we move toward, eyes focused on what we hope is paradise at the end. If retirement is the reward we are focused on, then what are we truly missing before retirement?

YOUR LIFE.

Your exciting, passionate life that you can be living right now at this very moment. The life that you are saving like a set of guest towels or fine china, packed away ever so neatly for just the right time. The life that you talk to your financial planner about and save for every day. The life that you say, “Oh I can’t do that now, I have to wait.”

Why are we so hesitant to truly live the lives we want to live and feel the need to wait?

The answer is simple; fear. Fear of change, fear of money, fear of what people will think or say. Fear of living wildly and passionately by doing what you want to do every day instead waiting patiently for that magical retirement number to roll around.

Here’s your WAKE UP CALL to living your life right now! Living and doing that which adds passion and value to your life.

First let’s find your passion. What excites you, gives you that spark, that fire and allows you to view this retirement thing in a whole new light?

For me it was owning my own business as a massage therapist and living on a farm. Two separate dreams that merged into a life that I find exciting and passionate. To add to the exciting adventure I call my life, I am happy to say that now I’ve added my love for writing.

Anything is possible if you open your mind and listen to your heart’s desire.

Danielle LaPorte has the best empowering video for fueling your passion and getting your mojo started:

If you can’t see the video above click here.

Second is the BIG money question;“I have bills to pay and I need to make so much money to survive.”

I thought the same thing before I quit my corporate job to pursue my massage therapy business. The surprising thing I found was I could live on much less. I was astonished by the fact that I was making less money (and uncertain money ~ remember starting a business) and eliminated more debt while still paying my household and business bills.(In full disclosure here I have to add that I have made my share of money mistakes but I still came out ahead.)

What’s the money secret? First it’s not a secret; I knew that I HAD to master the money thing for it to work. I was determined not to let money be the barrier between doing a job I love while living my exciting life all before retirement.

Later on I discovered the envelope system through Dave Ramsey and as simple as it sounds it works. “You have to tell your money where to go,” Dave says and it’s true. Once you give your money direction you will be amazed at the results.

What is the envelope system? It is a simple method of having envelopes set up for your cash expenses and filling them with the money allotted each week from your budget. This is the same “system” that your grandparents and parents used and it still works today.

The third thing that may be putting your exciting life on hold is; “I like having nice stuff.”

Let’s separate the “I like nice stuff” from the stuff you may truly need. What will you do when the fridge dies or the water heater breaks?

Let me bring you back to the envelope system. It works every time and cash helps you break the “plastic habit.” Also spending cash keeps you very honest with your purchases and gives you leverage when making those purchases. Cash talks!

And the final question is “I can’t leave my job because….”

You are the sole support of your family or you may feel you have too much time invested in your job to pursue another. All of these are valid reasons. But making time for a life that you are passionate and excited about before you retire is very a valid reason also.

Rearranging your work schedule or working part time might allow you to enjoy something you have been putting off until retirement time rolls around. Who knows you may find a new career path that gives you the excitement and pleasure you desire and deserve right now.

Be bold enough to invent your own retirement life instead of modeling what the rest of the world does. Find your passion, pay off your debt and start living your life in this moment! Don’t let that magical retirement number dictate how you live your life.

Let me know what your plans are for living a passionate and fulfilling life before retirement. I love hearing your comments.

*For my Zen Chick Community members check out my new website design by clicking on the link in your email. Let me hear your feedback and thanks so much for your support.

photo credit: IronRodArt – Royce Bair (NightScapes on Thursdays) via photo pin cc

Choosing Happiness

Living Your Life “Before” Retirement

Archives for June 2012