Zen Chick

Zen Chick

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"There is more to life than increasing its speed. Slow down, breathe and enjoy. "

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Archives for January 2014

Want To Suck The Life Out Of Your Life? Keep Saying This…..

By Gay Barefield Leave a Comment Jan 25

“When you make a choice, you change the future.” ~ Deepak Chopra

The words that will suck the life out of your life are some of the few words that will both anger and sadden me when I hear someone or even myself saying them. (which I try not to do!)

“I guess I have no choice.”

I was having an email conversation the other day when the other person felt like they were not getting what they wanted so the response was “Well I guess I have no choice.” Picture Eeyore here, head and ears drooped, telling Pooh that life is so depressing and there’s nothing he can do about it. Now in true Pooh wisdom, which is what I channeled, I said “You do have a choice” and I went about listing options, adding honey to my email voice.

Two different views, Eeyore (btw, I love Eeyore) playing the victim, handing over his power to Pooh and Pooh giving Eeyore his power back and adding honey. That’s making a choice.

Choosing not to make a choice is still a choice, it’s a choice that says, “I don’t care how my life goes so you decide” or it says, “I’m trying to get my way or make you bend to my rules so I’m pretending to hand you my power.” (read:choice)

“I discovered I always have choices and sometimes it’s only a choice of attitude.”~Judith M. Knowlton

Good, bad or indifferent, choices define our lives and when you don’t make them you miss out on living your life fully. Even bad choices are lessons we need to learn and when we turn away from them we never lean into the whole of that lesson.

But what about the big choices? The change your job, start a business, move to a new place, sell everything and travel kind of choices, what stops us from making those?

There’s lots of excuses, bills to pay, family to take care of, too close to retirement or any other reasons that society will pat you on the back and tell you “it’s okay.” Now you are off the hook, choice made for you and lots of people will agree with that choice because they have made it too.  (read:safety in numbers)

I believe that most of the time we see the big choices as an all or nothing option so we try to quickly hand them off. But at some point in your life will you look back and say “what if I had made a different choice?”

Here’s a different approach, what if you took those big choices, the ones that really tug at your heart and speak to you constantly and turned them into bite size choices. Smaller choices that get you to the bigger one in small steps. Wouldn’t that make the choice easier?

Any choice is a big deal for you and your life, even the ones that feel very benign.

You never know where a simple choice might lead you someday so step into your power, not away from it and choose your life, your attitude and how you want to feel. And when you feel the words “I guess I don’t have a choice” coming into your head, stop, breathe and choose. Making a choice will keep the life in your life!

Tell me how you feel about making choices and what choices you have made that really changed your life.

Share the love of this post with someone in your life that might need more choices in theirs. 

photo credit: Kratka Photography via photopin cc

Be a Rule Breaker and See This Year Differently.

By Gay Barefield Leave a Comment Jan 11

“Following all the rules leaves a completed checklist.

Following your heart achieves a completed you.” 
~ Ray Davis

Ready to change the way you think and live? Ready to trust your heart, soul and intuition to lead you on your journey this year?

Then let’s break some rules that have been holding you back and stifling your desire. ~nothing illegal, I promise 🙂

Ask anyone that knows me, I’m the person that will research a new project or idea until the cows come home. After a full year (2013) of doing that I realized the other day that I was really sick of listening to one more person telling me how to do “things right.”

Now I’m not saying that any of the advice was wrong, it wasn’t, in fact it was very helpful. Teachers and mentors can help you bring your own hidden wisdom to the surface and point it in the right direction. What was really wrong was the fact that I was caught in a vicious loop of never ending information. Knowing that helped me realize that I had to break out and break some rules.

“Sometimes we have to step out of our comfort zones. We have to break the rules. And we have to discover the sensuality of fear. We need to face it, challenge it, dance with it.” ~Kyra Davis

I had tamped down my ability to see my own way and to trust my gut. Knowing that I had created things before and I had the capability to do it again, it was time to take the road less traveled and define my own path.

Let me stop here and acknowledge all of my teachers and mentors (deep bow, hands to heart) who still give me insight and wisdom. No I won’t kick them to the curb, I just add my own intuition to all of their insights.

One of the things I learned this past year, that I will use as a mantra for this year is “Start before you are ready.” This is the perfect rule breaking mantra because it allows you the ability of not waiting until everything is perfect, the planets and stars are in alignment and Mercury is NOT in retrograde.

Taking what you have learned, what you know and adding your own twist so that the final product, the journey or whatever you are working on is true for you.

We all have a personal spin that is put on everything we do, whether it’s how you dress, talk, write, paint, teach or whatever and even though you may be doing the same thing everyone else is doing, your personality shines through and makes it uniquely you.

Which gets us back to rule breaking, trusting that you know what is best for you and your journey. Taking in all of the wisdom and information you need to make good decisions for yourself but in the end moving to the beat of your own unique drum.

In all of our hearts and souls, we are rebels on some level and trusting that rebel side will allow it to come out and help you make those bold decisions. But what if it takes you down a wrong path?

Even if you end up on a dead end street of bad ideas, you will still learn something worth the journey. The next time you will know what not to do and how you need to change things.

Isn’t that what a life well lived is all about?

I hope you will join me in making your 2014 the year of breaking rules and breaking out of your norm! I would love to hear your comments on what rules you plan on breaking this year.

Share the love of this post with a friend who also needs to break some rules in their life and together you can support each other on an incredible journey.

 

photo credit: sgrace via photopin cc

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This is a place where we learn to slow down, enjoy our lives as they are right now, and simplify through reconnecting with nature and the moon. Learn more on the About Me page.

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These are charities that I believe are making a difference in our world. I welcome you to check them out and please donate if one speaks to you.

World Central KitchenWorld Central KitchenI believe that food, shelter and water are basic rights for every human on this planet. Jose’ Andres’ and his WCK group step in to provide beautiful, nutritious food during disasters, the pandemic, and any other opportunity where people need to be fed.Learn More Foothills Humane SocietyFoothills Humane SocietyThis is my local shelter, in Columbus, NC, doing a wonderful job at remaining as close to 100% no kill as possible. Animals make us more human and I believe in adopting not shopping for pets, saving a life with a new beginning.Learn More Trees, Water & People Trees, Water & People Caring for Mother Earth by planting trees, helping people live sustainably and decreasing our carbon footprint are things that I see as very important for the next seven generations.Learn More Lakota Law ProjectLakota Law ProjectI have a strong kinship to Native people and this group works to change many of the injustices done to the first people that still go on today, such as the right to vote.Learn More

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